十招助你解决工作场合的人际冲突 |
十招助你解决工作场合的人际冲突 by 一人清唱
When people work together in groups, there are bound to be occasions when they disagree and conflicts arise in the workplace. Whether these disagreements become full-blown feuds or instead fuel creative problem solving is, in large part, up to the person in charge。当人们以小组形式在一起工作时，一定会出现大家意见不合的情况，工作场合就会爆发冲突。这些分歧是会导致斗争彻底爆发还是创造性地解决问题，在很大程度上取决于那个负责人。
You can do a lot to set the tone. You can ensure that your employees deal with disagreements in proactive, productive ways if you know when and how to intervene -- and when to let things be。你可以采取很多行动来决定事情的走向。你可以确保你的员工用积极的、富有成效的方式来处理分歧，如果你知道何时以及如何介入，而何时该任其发展。
Read on for 10 practical tips for dealing with employee disagreements in the workplace。下面是解决工作场合员工冲突的10个实用贴士。
1. Identify the Problem1. 确定问题所在
Make sure everyone involved knows exactly what the issue is and why they’re arguing. Allow each person to clarify their perspectives and opinions, giving equal time for them to express their thoughts. If necessary, establish a time limit (say, 5 minutes per person)， and ensure that all parties stick to it while stating their cases. It’s your responsibility to make sure everyone feels safe and supported, and that no one feels ganged up on。确保涉及冲突的每个人都完全清楚问题所在以及他们争论的原因。允许每个人阐明自己的观点和意见，给他们相同的时间表达自己的看法。如果必要的话，可以限定一个时间(比如每个人5分钟)，保证所有人陈述时都紧扣主题。你有责任确保每个人都感到安全而且得到支持，没有人觉得自己被围攻。
Talk things through until you reach your first level of consensus: Everyone agrees that there’s a problem and is clear on the nature of the problem. Don’t force solutions before the situation is clear。形成共识的第一个层面——每个人都承认有问题而且都清楚问题的本质——这时才开始彻底谈论问题。在情况还不清楚时不要勉强得出解决方案。
2. Listen with Open Ears2. 洗耳恭听
We’ve all heard parodies of the kind of shrink-speak that simply echoes what someone is saying, but a little reflective listening, used correctly, can stimulate conflict resolution。我们都听过那种只是简单附和别人言论的拙劣模仿，但如果运用得当，略带沉思的倾听可以有助于解决冲突。
Make sure everyone understands what has just been said, including the speaker. Ralph may be going on and on about extra work and the need for training, but try to find and clarify the underlying message: “What I think Ralph is saying is that he feels he is constantly fixing other people’s mistakes。”确保每个人都理解刚刚发言的人说了什么，包括发言者本人。拉尔夫可能正关于加班和培训需求滔滔不绝，但你要试着找出并指明他潜在的信息：“我认为拉尔夫是说他感觉自己总是在弥补他人的过错。”
A little conflict-resolution training can help you learn some tricks for getting to the second level of consensus: Now everyone knows what the heck Ralph is talking about。一点解决冲突的训练可以让你学会一些办法，达成共识的第二个层面——现在每个人都明白拉尔夫到底在讲什么了。
3. Identify the Ideal End Result3.确定理想的最终结果
What’s the end result, from each party’s point of view? One trick: Try asking each participant to write down their vision of the perfect outcome, and then read each piece out loud without identifying the author. This way, personal prejudices and separate agendas can be removed from the mix。每一方眼里的最终结果是什么？这里有一个办法：试着让每个参与者写下他们眼中最完美的结果，然后把每个人写的大声读出来，但不要点明作者。这样就可以排除个人偏见和单独议程。
This process will lead to your third level of consensus: Everyone agrees on the specifics of their differences. Or it may come as a great surprise to all to discover that their visions aren’t so far apart after all。这会帮助你达成共识的第三个层面：每个人都就他们分歧中的某些部分达成一致，或者他们会惊讶地发现他们的观点其实相差并不大。
4. Plan the Likelihood of Achieving Everyone’s Goals4. 计划实现每个人目标的可能性
Figure out what can realistically be done to achieve everyone’s goals. If action is taken, how will this affect the company’s projects and objectives? Will the end result be worth the time and energy spent? If the attempt fails, what’s the worst that can happen?考虑一下，想要实现每个人的目标，有哪些现实的解决办法。如果要采取行动，会对公司的计划和目标产生怎样的影响？这个最终的结果是否值得花费这些时间和精力？如果尝试失败，最糟糕的的结果是什么？
Talk through the “what ifs” together, as a team. Make sure everyone has a chance to be heard, and to hear other opinions. It may be that imagining possible scenarios will lead to shifting priorities, and maybe even new ideas, as you reach your fourth level of consensus: You’re addressing the problem together。作为一个团队一起讨论这些可能出现的状况。确保每个人都能表达自己的意见，并且倾听他人的观点。想象可能出现的情况也许会让你们改变事情的优先顺序，甚至产生新的想法，这时你就到达了形成共识的第四个层面：你们正在一起解决问题。
5. Find an Area of Compromise5. 找出妥协区域
It’s often the case that conflicts arise over small differences in style, rather than substance, when everyone is really trying to achieve the same goals。通常情况下冲突都是一些表面上的小差异造成的，而并不是实质问题，其实每个人都在试着达成相同的目标。
Is there some part of the issue on which everyone agrees? If not, identify bigger-picture, long-term goals that mean something to everyone and start from there. Encourage all to think about what they’d be comfortable giving up to reach the agreed-upon goals together. Achieving your fifth level of consensus means that everyone understands what’s required to move forward as a team。问题中是否有某一部分是每个人都认同的？如果没有，确定更大的画面和长期的目标这样对每个人都有意义的东西，就从这里开始。鼓励所有人想一想如果他们放下分歧、一起达成共同的目标，会多么舒服。达到形成共识的第五个层面就意味着每个人都明白，作为一个团队共同前进需要怎么做。
6. Don’t Play Favorites6. 不要厚此薄彼
It’s human nature to like some people more than others, and it’s also all too human to respond to flattery and sucking-up. We all love attention, but succumbing to blatant efforts to win your favor will only weaken your position as a leader. Other employees will always notice if one person or group is consistently singled out for special treatment, or another is consistently ignored。对某些人更加偏爱是人的本性，同样对恭维奉承有反应也是人之常情。我们都喜欢被关注，但是屈服于那些为了赢得你偏爱所做的浮夸举动只会削弱你作为领导者的地位。如果某个人或者某个小组总是得到特殊待遇，或者另一些人总是被忽略，其他的员工都会察觉到。
Make an effort to treat all of your employees fairly and equally, and accord them the same level of respect. Recognize and praise accomplishment. If employees feel valued and appreciated for the work they do, they’re less likely to jockey for position and start fights。努力平等公正地对待你所有的员工，并且给予他们同样的尊重。认同并赞赏他们的成就。如果员工们感觉到了他们所做的工作有价值而且得到赏识，就不太可能为了职位你争我夺。
7. Don’t Allow Gang Ups7. 不允许小团体存在
Disagreement often goes hand in hand with water cooler politics and internal lobbying. If you suspect that employees are making side deals to get support for their agendas, do your best to ignore these shenanigans and keep an objective perspective about the issues at hand。分歧通常都伴随着“饮水机政治”和内部小团体。如果你怀疑某些员工私下拉帮结派以寻求支持，就尽最大努力无视他们的把戏，对眼前的问题保持一个客观的态度。
Make sure everyone understands the company’s goals and expectations, including the expectations of each individual. Be as clear as you can about job descriptions, responsibilities, and territories. Discourage gossip, and don’t put people in the position of spying or reporting on each other. Create consistent performance review procedures that apply to everyone equally。确保每个人都明白公司的目标和期望，包括每个人的期望。尽可能清楚地阐明职位描述、员工职责以及界限。制止流言蜚语，不要让人做卧底或者打小报告。制定对每个人都公平的一致的业绩评价流程。
8. Take Preventive Measures8. 采取防范措施
A little forethought can go a long way toward preventing conflicts among coworkers. To minimize the incidence of spats, bring issues out in the open before they become problems. Informal counseling provides managers and supervisors with an effective means of addressing and managing conflict in the workplace. This may take the form of meetings, negotiation/mediation sessions, or other dispute-resolution processes. Informal resolution of complaints at any stage of the process also provides managers with a no-fault, low- or no-cost means of restoring harmony and productivity to the organization。一点小小的防范措施对防止同事间的冲突大有帮助。为了把冲突的概率降到最低，在事件演变为问题之前就开诚布公。非正式的咨询是经理和主管解决处理工作场合冲突的有效手段。可以以会谈、协商、调解会的形式，或者是其他处理分歧的形式。在这一过程的任何阶段以非正式的方式化解怨气，也为经理们提供了一种零过失、低成本或者零成本的方式，为公司重建和睦和生产力。
It will help to have a clearly thought-out process for resolving conflicts. Provide appropriate training for all employees, teach everyone basic conflict-resolution skills, and set an example by using them yourself。用一种深思熟虑得出的方案来解决冲突大有帮助。为所有员工提供合适的培训，教会每个人基本的解决矛盾的技巧，并且自己运用这些技巧以树立榜样。
9. Keep Expectations Realistic9. 保持现实的期望
No amount of training will eliminate conflict in the workplace, and your employees aren’t going to become paragons of diplomacy overnight. But the example you set and the resources you provide will make a difference over time。再多的培训也不可能杜绝工作场合的冲突，你的员工们也不可能一夜之间成为交际模范。但随着时间推移，你树立的榜样以及提供的资源会让改变发生。
Generally speaking, managers who successfully handle conflicts in their organizations will experience lower rates of complaints than managers who fail to do so. Additionally, informal resolution of complaints terminates further administrative processing and related costs。总体来说，那些成功处理了公司内部矛盾的经理被抱怨的可能性比那些没有做到这一点的经理要低。此外，用非正式的方法来化解怨气可以避免接下来的行政处理以及相关的成本。
10. Remind Everyone That Manners Matter10. 向每个人重申礼仪的重要性
Finally, old-fashioned civility can bring a sense of peace and harmony to an otherwise stressful workplace. Incivility in the office carries a very high price in both human and financial terms. Conversely, a more respectful workplace environment means a better quality of life for employees。最后，老式的礼仪可以为紧张的工作场合带来和睦与和谐的感觉。在办公室的无礼行为会让公司在人力和财力上都付出高昂代价。相反，一个更加讲礼仪的工作环境对员工来说意味着更好的生活品质。
Higher quality of life for your employees means higher-quality work, which should be an incentive for any employer to foster a “culture of civility” at work. Treat people politely and respectfully, and take them。员工们更高的生活品质意味着更高的工作质量，这应该促使每个雇主在工作中打造“礼仪文化”。礼貌尊重地对待员工，你就能赢得他们。
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